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Hour of Mercy: 3:00 p.m
Daily Reflections, supplications and prayers
Monday, May 16, 2022
1. Reflection:
Toward the end of the first year of my novitiate, darkness began to cast its shadow over my soul. I felt no consolation in prayer; I had to make a great effort to meditate; fear began to sweep over me. Going deeper into myself, I could find nothing but great misery. I could also clearly see the great holiness of God. I did not dare to raise my eyes to Him, but reduced myself to dust under His feet and begged for mercy. My soul was in this state for almost six months. Our beloved Mother Directress [Mary Joseph14] encouraged me in these difficult moments. But this suffering continued to grow stronger.
The second year of the novitiate was approaching. Whenever I recalled that I was to make my vows, my soul shuddered. I did not understand what I was reading; I could not meditate; it seemed to me that my prayer was displeasing to God. It seemed to me that by approaching the Holy Sacraments I was offending God even more. But despite this, my confessor [Father Theodore15] did not let me omit one single Holy Communion. God was working very strangely in my soul. I did not understand anything at all of what my confessor was telling me. The simple truths of the faith became incomprehensible to me. My soul was in anguish, unable to find comfort anywhere.
(9) At a certain point, there came to me the very powerful impression that I am rejected by God. This terrible thought pierced my soul right through; in the midst of the suffering my soul began to experience the agony of death. I wanted to die but could not. The thought came to me: of what use is it to strive for virtues; why mortify oneself when all this is disagreeable to God? When I made this known to the Directress of Novices, I received this reply, “Know, dear Sister, that God has chosen you for great sanctity. This is a sign that God wants to have you very close to Himself in Heaven. Have great trust in the Lord Jesus.”
That dreadful thought of being rejected by God is the actual torture suffered by the damned. I fled to Jesus‟ Wounds and repeated the words of trust, but these words became for me an even greater torture. I went before the Blessed Sacrament, and I began to speak to Jesus: “Jesus, You said that a mother would sooner forget her infant than God His creature, and that „even if she would forget her infant, I, God, will never forget My creature.‟ O Jesus, do You hear how my soul is moaning? Deign to hear the painful whimpers of Your child. I trust in You, O God, because heaven and earth will pass, but Your word will last forever.” Still, I found not a moment of relief (Saint María Faustina Kowalska, Divine Mercy in My Soul, Diary, 23).
2. Supplications:
- Let us ask for the grace to find our strength in the Eucharistic,
- Let us pray for all people who live under the bonds of the evil one,
- Let us ask the Lord to have commiseration of our suffering humanity and for the end of the spread of COVID-19 throughout the world,
- For the souls in purgatory,
- For our suffering humanity and for our personal intentions.
3. Resolutions of the day:
Collaborate in the Salvation of a specific soul,
4. Final Prayer:
Oh my God, I have known that I am not from this Earth. Oh My Good Merciful Jesus, King of Mercy, I trust in You, and only in you I Hope. Amen. Jesus I Trust in You. (Cf. Diary, 107)
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